Quitting the pill is a series of essays where I explore femininity, my cycle, natural birth control, connecting to my womb wisdom and living in tune with the natural rhythms of my body. The second part is about the three things I did to be able to live intuitively and be guided by my inner compass: quit the pill, track my cycle and embracing the four stages women go through every month.
I wake up before my alarm clock at 6:30 am. I breathe deeply and my stretch out my body. It feels light, strong and flexible. Doing vinyasa ashtanga yoga for the last 6 months on an almost daily basis is paying off. I feel my heart picking up pace. Energy is flowing through my throat, heart space and pelvic area and I know what this means. This is a creating type of day. A giving birth to something and manifesting type of day. I check my ovulation tracker app, Clue and I can see that I’m moving into my fertile window, when ovulation takes place.
If you had asked me two years ago to explain a menstrual cycle and the way it manifests in the female body, I’d just give the textbook explanation that every month an egg nestles in the womb and if it’s not fertilised, it will be shed from your body along with blood, pain and a bad mood. I also thought that it was very easy for women to get pregnant, hence why we need to be on birth control the whole time.
However, I noticed that my cervical fluid (I hate the word ‘vaginal discharge’ it sounds so nasty) would change throughout the month and I’d always thought it was weird that it would leave traces on my underwear.
As a super productive and a-type personality, I’d always wanted to be on top of my game and hated the days where I just wanted to stay in bed all day and do nothing. I’d force myself to go out and do things, with the use of stimulants.
I was clueless that all these things were clues (see what I did there 😉 ) to understanding my body and that my real power lies in allowing my body to do its thing and surrendering to the rhythmical flow and cyclic female nature. I will walk you through the three steps I took to come at this point in my life, where I’m being guided by my inner compass and womb wisdom.
I will talk about juices, pussy and deep emotions in this post. If you’re ashamed or grossed out by this, then I invite you to ask yourself why.
If you’re ready to stop ignoring your cycle, embrace your body and live in tune with your natural rhythms, please join me on this journey.
Final disclaimer, I advice you to do your own research as I am not a medical professional and I’m not responsible for any unwanted pregnancies. I’m sharing my own experience and what has helped me along my journey. Please seek the advice of a doctor if you have concerns about your reproductive health or yoni.
Step 1: Quit the pill
It wasn’t until I quit birth control that I was able to see and feel what was going on in my body.
Depending on how long you’ve been on birth control, it can take up to years before you return to your natural cycle. I didn’t have my period for a year after I quit contraceptive drugs.
During that year I felt out of balance and I had a hard time living my truth. I don’t know if it was divine alignment or coincidence, but it wasn’t until I met my ex-boyfriend that my cycle started again.
Step 2: Tracking your cycle
In the beginning I thought it was super complicated to track your cycle, but thanks to books like Taking Charge Of Your Fertility and period tracker apps like Clue, it’s so easy and fun. Do it from a place of curiosity and wonder of how your body, without your intervention, does all this stuff every month.
First of all, I use the app Clue, which has a beautiful and easy to use interface, to track my cycle. You can also use the sheet from Taking Charge of Your fertility, if you prefer to write it down.
Your cycle starts on the first day of bleeding. This is day 1. Start taking note of your body and emotions. What I track is:
- How heavy the bleeding is
- After the menstruation, my cervical fluid
- How your pussy feels (wet, sticky or dry)
- How much pain I have
- What emotions I experience
- How much I slept
- If I had sex or not
- How my skin looks (good, oily, dry, acne,..)
Other things that you may want to track are:
- Your body temperature when you just wake up, even before you get out of bed or go to the toilet.
- The position of your cervix
Personally, I think the most important thing to start with is observing your juices. It’s pretty straight forward and as soon as you get it, it’s an easy pattern to understand.
When you go from pre – ovulation to ovulation (ovulation meaning when you can get pregnant), your juices will go from nothing, to sticky (a thick paste, gum like consistency) to creamy (between paste like and egg white) and to wet and translucent like egg white (it’s stretchy and always comes with a wet pussy sensation). After ovulation it will go back to dry and or sticky.
Another good thing to take note of is traces your cervical juices leave on your underwear. If it’s a symmetrical round circle, your approaching ovulation as these fluids contain a lot of water. If it’s more like long rectangle lines, it’s the dry, non-wet fluid.
I recommend to start observing this and when you feel comfortable with this, you can add more elements, like taking your temperature and the position of your cervix.
If you would like to start following a natural birth control method, you need to track
and cervix position to be sure as relying on 1 fertility sign is not enough.
Please read Taking Charge Of Your Fertility to educate yourself.
Step 3: Living in tune with your cycle
Every month women go through 4 phases:
Pre – ovulation
The Maiden: first time menstruating (She’s full of ideas, possibilities and potential)
The Mother: first time sex (She’s able to take the energy of the maiden and put it into action)
The Wise Wild Woman: First time child birth (She has gone through being a maidenhood and motherhood and know who she is)
The Crone: menopause (She is the wisdom keeper, has the ultimate perspective and has nothing left to prove)
In ancient times, these stages were celebrated with big rituals, but today we’re not honouring this things anymore. A lot of these things carry shame and guilt.
As we go through the these 4 phases every month, we also go through these stages which have distinct qualities and right now I’m exploring them and living more in synch with them.
What I’m doing right now is:
Pre – ovulation: write down goals, dream big, make my plans.
Ovulation: birth new things, create, manifest, launch programs, host events.
Premenstrual: let things go, refine, perfect, and create powerful authentic work.
Menstruation: rest, make decisions, get clarity on future projects.
I invite you to join me on this exploration of our cyclic nature and stop viewing our bodies as weird or our emotions a nuisance.
What is your relationship to your cycle?
Are you aware of the motions that you go through?
How can you live more in tune with your cycle?
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